Getting steamy with gaming

A few days ago I decided to hop back into Team Fortress 2 as I've really been missing pc gaming and long for the thrill of taking down the same players with my sentry, respawn after respawn.

So I gave it a whizz. I failed miserably. During a MvM match someone on headset added that they didn't think they liked this demo... The demoman was me. -sobs into Kermit the Frog backpack-

Anywho, thought I'd try my hand at a few of the games I bought as part of the Steam Summer Sale 2012.

I'm currently on From Dust, which looks wonderfully impressive visually, but I've yet to decide whether it's actually a good game. We shall soon see. Ten minutes into the install already, we're getting there folks...

Riding the crazy horse

Guys. I'm totally cheating on you to write for another game site.
It's just that the ridiculously awesome dudes over at Crazy Horse Gaming asked me and Alex to write some stuff. You know how it is. I still love you though.

Nah, I'm still here.
I'm just occasionally going to pop over to CHG to do some news, maybe the odd review and definitely partake in more than a droplet of podcasts.

You can catch my article on Valve's new announcement here: http://crazyhorsegaming.blogspot.co.uk/2013/09/valve-announces-new-operating-system.html

Be sure to check out the rest of the site while you're there and our awesome cast profiles!

Inconspicuously picking up strangers.

I'm not going to say how much time I've logged on GTA V today.

I actually forgot to drink for a few hours.

All part of the experience, right?

Also, is it normal to be addicted to taxi missions when you have an entire county full of vastly varied and far-from-usual quests at your disposal?

It's been nice knowing you!

GTA V.
Doritos.
Beer.

'Nuff said.
See you in a few days, world.

It's not the drugs, I swear.

So yesterday, whilst being trained for my new temp* job (that I'm not going to write about because I'm so completely over the moon about it that the post would go on endlessly. My fangirlish excitement would dominate the blog and the twitter account would be a spam feed of joy...) one of the guys -who will furthermore be referred to as Sensei Overlord the Great since he has literally been trying to teach me everything and in return just been lumbered with the most useless piece of meat ever- validated the fact he was a proper gamer by indicating his bloodshot eyeballs and eye bags. He said he doesn't partake in the usage of illicit drugs and that it was purely the gaming.

I mean really, is that not a confession?

I would have been suspicious, had I actually found any of the ridiculous aesthetic complaints he spoke of. We gotta work on boosting that dude's self-image feels, y'know?

Anyway. It got me thinking about gaming as an addiction, about how toxic it had been to me as a youngster and how wildly that has changed in recent years. Seriously. It's gone from having the most negative impact to making some vital changes in how I think. I'm not going to say #GAMINGSAVEDMYLYF2K19, but it's definitely affected how I live.

I was a nervous little kiddie. I'm not going to go into details, ain't nobody got time for that! But I had some very good reasons for the anxiety. Playing through games where you have half a second to react before another fearsome multi-mouthed creature launches himself at you from the dark depths of all your nightmares has actually SERIOUSLY helped me. I'm getting used to being under pressure. I don't think I've properly panicked in at least a few weeks now -insert the happiest face you've ever seen, right here bbz-

*I say 'temp' with a lot of pain. But I have a plan to remedy that. I'm going to log over a thousand hours on Watch Dogs in a valiant attempt to learn some actual hacking skills. Once relevant skills are obtained, I'm going to hack myself into the servers at work and become a permanent fixture in their system. I will have to sacrifice my human form and become an entirely coded entity, never to be spoken to or see by any humanoid life form ever again- but it will be worth it.

What has gaming done for you?

And the brutality was legendary!

So I'm back from my weekend away, didn't escape the gaming chit-chat for a second though! Got the chance to learn a little about why EVE is so addictive, when talking to a particularly passionate player. It actually sounds pretty swell!

Anywho, when I got back I found out Alex had picked up a game he thought I'd like:

Do you see that? DO YOU SEE THE ANIMATED VERSION OF JACK BLACK RIGHT THERE ON THE COVER ATOP A MOUNTAIN OF HEAVY METAL FANS WIELDING A GORGEOUS GUITAR AND EVEN SEXIER BATTLE-AXE?! We both know you're already itching to change your underwear.

Man it's beautiful.

I've logged maybe an hour so far? The weekend really knocked it out of me so I got an early night, but boy that hour was good! An enjoyable open-worldish game with a more-than-generous helping of metal and buckets of humor richly piled on, this could very quickly rise through the ranks and become my favourite game. I'll keep you posted.

Have you guys started any oldish games recently?

Another one bites the dust.

Finally finished Halo Two at some silly hour last night. It was a brilliant one story-line wise but the needlers weren't that great this time around. It's totally fine, I started rocking those red Brute plasma guns!

It's actually really strange seeing how much it altered gameplay when you switch to play the Arbiter. More on that in my full review soon!

I'd happily move straight onto Halo ODST now but I'm afraid I'm having to put the whole mission on pause until Tuesday, as I'm away. Sadness fills my heart.

See you in a bit lovelies!

Maybe I'm just that superficial.

Recent news of Nintendo launching a '2DS' first got me giggling. "Are they for real?" I chuckled at my laptop screen. Then I saw it.

Oh gosh. It's beautiful.

It doesn't do anything the 3DS can't. We have a 3DS here and on the rare occasion I pick it up, I would ALWAYS use it in 2D as that function is easily turned off with the slide of a.. slider. And the 3D hurts my eyes.

Aside from just not having the capability to play things in 3D, the difference lies mainly in the appearance of this gorgeous hunk of retro-styled candy.

Source: http://www.techradar.com/reviews/gaming/handheld-consoles/nintendo-2ds-1176863/review

Its blocky, candybar design with combined with the classic D-pad result in the perfect crossover between Nintendo's current generation of handhelds and their classic Gameboy.



It seems a little less portable than current gen, as there's no longer the option to fold it down. But strangely enough, I think that adds to its charm. Isn't there something beautiful in those old chunky mobile phones from the 80s?

Source: http://analogoverdigital.tumblr.com/

And so, although we already have a perfectly fine 3DS that plays all the 3DS games in two-dimensions as well, I'll probably still be getting this on looks alone. Maybe I'm just that superficial...

The Nintendo 2DS is being released on October 12th 2013 (Same as Pokemon X and Y, of course) and you can pre-order the Black And Blue or White and Red versions for £109 over at GAME now!

I'm definitely interested, but what do you guys think about the 'step backwards'?

Next Gen: Sony, you cheeky things you!

Oh Sony... You just might have converted me!

So if you have the patience to read the last post, you'll see I'm all about the Xbox.
That is where I pledge my soul.
And y'all know about this raging war between the hardcore Sonys and Microsofts of the world?
Well I feel just as patriotic.
Though I absolutely loved gaming on the PS Vita, I owe all my allegiance to Microsoft and have never dreamed of buying any gaming product Sony has ever put out. Until the next gen shebang arrived.

Boy is my head screwed up now!

At first it was a downright Xbox One all the way. Purely out of honor alone. Before any information was released it was a no-brainer that our bedsit would one day have an Xbox One on the floor where the 360 used to live. End of. Sony was never even slightly an option...

But after a month-long decision making process, we're actually really considering going for the Play Station 4. Shock dang horror!

What's made this decision so hard is that it's pretty much mutually concrete, and we're both devastated over a single Xbox One exclusive whose franchise has been a MASSIVE part of both our gaming experiences... Guessed it yet? Its younger brothers feature heavily in the last post..

Halo Five.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND MY PAIN?!

From humble beginings...

I started on Xbox.

I mean, if we want to be all exact about where I started gaming you could go right back to my first set of bricks, moving up to my cook-along kitchen playset at my grandparent's house, right up to when we got the family computer with this brand new and super exciting game called 'ZOO Tycoon' (the likes of which I'd never seen before! A combination of mind-blowing graphics and animal dung - wowzers all 'round!) when our dial-up connection finally got a bit faster, I hit the web to have a bash at this whole 'Runescape' phenomenon and eventually wound up totally hooked on MMORPGs.

Between that and the PS2 entering our household, our family acquired its first ever TV console. It was a shockingly small little thing, connecting to the television with just two cables. But from its unassuming machine box jutted a striking and familiar joystick. A red button sitting proudly beside it. It was the magnificent Namco Plug 'n Play 5-in-1.

Source: http://videogame.brando.com

Joyous shrills would time and time again ripple through our family as we gethered together to watch each other play through Dig-Dug without being scorched by the pixel dragon, or laughter would fill the room as my little brother lost time and time again to the ghosts chasing him 'round the screen on Pacman.
It was beautiful, and we were heartbroken when it finally broke. I think I'd sat on it, actually. I like to think I chucked it across the room in rage and after being beaten by one of the other three games you could play on it, like a true gamer.

But it's alright yo, we bought another one.

I don't know what exactly happened to make us stop, maybe like all toys, it eventually just lost our interest. I cannot imagine how with the likes of Rally X, the most incredibly high-tech racing game you will EVER see in your LIFE. But yes, it happened.

Then Playstation entered our lives when my little brother bought a PS2 from a kid in town.
It eventually 'broke' but I watched some tutorials online, took that sucker to pieces and fixed it up again. When it broke for real we were deeply sadden... So like the trusty little joystick box that had kept us entertained before, we just replaced it with another one.

The playstation was tons of fun, and I'd really enjoyed the hours spent owning and being a general musical god on Guitar Hero... But I was growing up and finding less and less time for gaming. I left my little brother in his own world to scour the streets of Vice City in Grand Theft Auto or stuff his face with donuts (or whatever) in The Simpsons Hit and Run. With him, I left gaming behind completely.

Sort of.

I met this really nerdy kid called Alex about three years ago. He GENUINELY looked like an actual 'drowned-rat' when he stepped off the train with my bestfriend who was introducing us that day. The palest skin possible and some kind of funky afro thing seemed to be growing from his head, I don't know... I thought it was his pet at first... Anyway. It wasn't long before he got all passionate about his gaming side, insulted when I called him simply a 'gamer'. "I'm a hardcore gamer!" he'd reply, full of pride.

He started me on Halo. I failed miserably, usually taking to hide behind walls until he cleared each area for me. Occassionally I'd peep out to shoot our comrade marines, because in Halo 1 that totally makes them glow pretty colours!

I didn't care for it then, but moving in with the nerd, not to mention being all engaged to him and whathaveyou has exposed the world of gaming to me in all its wonderful glory, and completely changed my mind on everything. I'm replaying through Halo now I actually care. I'm trying my best not to shoot our marines this time. I'm actually starting to take gaming seriously, and get to at least amateur level on my looking around skills...

Though technically not my first console, I will always feel that I started on Xbox.

Tell me about your beginnings as a gamer?

Fable Three: My kingdom of pies!

Alex suggested I start Fable Three a while back, as he knew I'd love it. It served many purposes, first it gave me some experience outside of the co-op shooters I've been trying to whizz through with him (I'm trying to build up a decent list of games under my belt. Shooters are the way to go, right?), second it provided a good, steady, lengthy storyline for me to get my teeth stuck into in between all the side-games.

For three weeks after starting it I pretty much played nothing but.

Shifting forward a bit now and I'm avoiding it like the Love Film salespeople in town. It's not that I dislike it, I'm just all pie'd out.

Y'see, I'm one of those goody goodies when it comes to gaming. I hate making the morally 'wrong' choice in any story. My main character must always be squeeky-clean (apart from a few little adventurous encounters on occassion, should my moral standing not be effected by such things.. Read: Bowerstone's People of the Night) and other than three small negative interactions I committed early on in the game, not realising they were bad, my character is as wholesome and good as I can manage so far.

Then Alex let slip that in the second part of the game, if I want to be good I'm going to have to bring in a lot of squilla for the luxury.

And so the endless pressing of X Y and A began... Most days I'd spend exploring Albion in the relative safety of daylight and when evening came I would fast-travel to the likes of Bowerstone or Brightwall to play shady, tuneless hits to seemingly adoring fans on the streets. Every single night. Do you know what that does to one's ankles?

Every so often I'd go off to partake in a cheeky bit of pie-fingering, just to mix things up a bit. But each and every time I was met by the same pie-maker who seemed to think every pie I made was the pie of the decade. I know not how she made any money, as she also seemed to be taking each one home with her for pudding...

Owning pretty much all the shops I've been able to get my mitts on has been useful for earning profit over time, but it's still not enough. I could absolutely quite my whining and do some side-quests while the dollar builds up by itself, but I'm a stubborn lass. I will not end my money-hoarding until I've made at LEAST 6 million.

So.. Only 3Mil to go then...

But since I now have no motivation to hop into the game when all that awaits me is fake-cheers,bshallow people who love me only for which makeup pack I'm wearing and a thieving crazy pie lady who steals from her OWN stall - my kingdom shall have to wait. I'm cheating on it for Oblivion anyway.

Are there any games you've totally ruined for yourself?